Spring Has Sprung ... and it's Going to be a Hot One

Geez. I just don't know where the time goes. The older I get, the faster it goes by.

Here it is, spring already. It was 80 degrees in the City of Angels the other day, and even though we're about 20 degrees cooler up here than in the flatlands, it looks to be a rather warm spring. I know what that means. It means a beastly summer is on tap. Fuck.

Those of you who have been faithful readers of my rather sporadic blogging know that I don't deal well with the heat. So what are we doing? We're looking for a house in the Delta region, where temps well in the 100's during the summer are common. We can't afford to move close to the Bay, so it's out in the mud flats for us. We're only looking at houses with pools, which is how I survive in those regions. We're also going through the pre-approval process for a loan right now. Damn... I knew we should have fixed our credit report before now. We haven't heard yet if we'll be approved or not (and if so, for how much), so keep your fingers crossed. We have to look at larger houses because if my mother gets full custody of the kids, that means we'll eventually get custody of them when she gets too old to take care of them (which also means that should be next year). I don't mind, though - as long as I'm still here and can take care of the little monkeys. They're already excited that we may be coming home. It's not me they're excited about - it's Grandpa and the pool that floats their boats. Oh well. The prices are amazing. We looked at a 3700 sq. ft. house (pool included) that's listed for $275K. You read that right. Of course, people are putting in offers like crazy on these things - the banks now have no vested interest in getting rid of properties quickly because of that stupid bill our president pushed through - so houses are selling for quite a bit above their asking prices. The deals are still good, though, so if we qualify for a decent loan, we should be able to get a good house.

Speaking of children, Daisy (our blabbermouth grand) told my mother that "Mommy is going to have a baby". Mom had her suspicions - I guess Amber's ass is as wide as two axe handles. I haven't seen her since she's cut off all ties with us, but I have a feeling that it's true. If it is, that bodes well for the court hearing in July. She'll be about eight months by then, and the judge isn't going to feel charitable towards her. This is the final hearing for permanent custody of the twins, and for someone who can't take care of the two she already has, it's not likely that a judge is going to grant custody of them to a pregnant mother. I just don't know where she went wrong. I regret the day I popped that monster out, and a monster she is. I may have been a wild child, but I never hurt people and always put my family first. Not Amber. She only considers us family when it suits her. Hubster and I have disowned her. We refuse to be hurt anymore. The one I feel sorry for is Amber's ex. He's a sweet young man with a lovely family, and I would have loved to be related to them. She seems, however, to like men who mistreat her. Sigh.

Not a lot has gone on in the past month, but we did manage to make it up to Stitches. I spent that Friday going through the marketplace with my dear friend from KaratStix, and then spent Saturday in Rabbitch's booth. I met some more people I've known for years online, and a good time was had by all. Saturday night, we took Rabbitch to San Francisco for dinner - we didn't have time for sightseeing - and had a wonderful meal full of great food, lovely conversation, and just plain enjoying each other's company. Hubster dozed off in the truck while we had dinner so we could spend time together without him. I'm glad I went - not only did I get to spend time with dear friends, I also picked up a few odds and ends, the most exciting of which is a rolling yarn cart with wheels that light up when they turn (I'm such a bag and bling whore). I can stuff more crap in this thing than I can in any of my other knitting bags. So, in addition to my stash, I'll be selling most of my knitting bags. We're still working on photography, but as soon as I'm done listing enough things to open the shop, I'll post it here. It should be soon because I don't want to haul a lot of extra yarn with us if we're lucky enough to move.

We have a good prospect for the bike, but I haven't heard from her for a few weeks. I dropped her an email last night asking if she's still interested in it, and I'm just waiting to hear back from her. I sure hope she still wants it. That would go a long way towards helping us qualify for a good loan, and it's one less (expensive) thing to have to truck up north. Again, keep your fingers crossed. Something good has to happen this year.

I've closed (or am trying to close) my account on Ravelry because I've had it with them. I posted an innocuous comment on one of the forums and saw the next day that it had been removed. When I wrote to the moderator to ask why, she wrote me back a horrible letter telling me, among other things, that I was a "lying, thieving, cheating bitch" (or words to that effect). She then proceeded to tell me that a friend of hers had been ripped off by me, that if I answered her letter, she was going to call the police department in my town, blah blah blah. I keep telling these snatch whores that we don't have a local police department, but they don't seem to believe me. It was a terrible, uncalled-for letter. Not only did she remove my comment, she deleted the entire thread the next day. Ravelry may have a lot of good things going for it, but it's changing from a knitting thing to a group of nasty women who form cliques and attack people whom they don't like for whatever reason. I thought I had left all that behind in high school. In any event, I'm tired of dealing with women like that and refuse to patronize a place where they congregate. So far, the powers that be over there haven't closed my account, so I'm just not logging in. I'm not impressed with the speed and/or quality of help you get when you log a complaint. I personally think that Ravelry has grown too large too fast, and whatever it was originally meant to be has long since disappeared. I think they've lost control of it, and when that happens with something that large, it tends to grow into something other than what it was meant to be. I don't see any way they could turn it back into a knitting/fiber forum-type place at this late date; it's already morphed into a living, breathing beast. I know a lot of people spend hours every day on it, and I also know that it has a lot of good qualities. I don't wish to partake of any of them, however. Please don't send me any more hate mail because of my opinion; I've also had it with that.

Emma is doing well; she's not limping any more. I got a really good referral from a good friend to a vet near us, so we'll be using him if anything happens. He doesn't take appointments, but we don't mind waiting. Anything for our Emma. She loves it here, but I think she'll love it no matter where we live as long as we're with her. She's gotten huge - big head, enormous chest, huge paws - and she's strong as the proverbial ox. She's also gotten in the habit of barking when she hears a noise and protecting me by inserting herself between me and the perceived danger. Whoever said that bullies aren't good guard dogs hasn't met the M.

I don't have any pictures for you this time, but I'm hoping to have some pictures of completed socks the next time I blog. I've got four pairs on the needles (I did have six, but got rid of two of them), and even if I only have one of each pair completed, at least it's something to show you. One of them is a plain pair, but the others are lace or have fancy features. I've got socks to make for friends (you know who you are), and a couple of those fall into that category. I'm actually using some yarn from my "new" stash (thank you, ladies), and have done really well with my buying habits. It helps that we don't have any expendable income and are also trying to save for the new house. Besides, I still have enough yarn to open another yarn shop. However, I have an army of people who are sworn to kick me in the ass if I even consider such a thing. While I loved my shop, I'm just not cut out to be a shop owner - not anymore. I met a lot of wonderful people, but it's just too much.

Nothing has changed in the health department. It's getting time to stock up on the magic herb again, which means I have to find a dispensary close by. Palm Springs has 27 of them, so I don't think it's going to be a problem. We don't want to drive all the way to Van Nuys, which is over a two-hour drive with traffic (and when isn't there traffic around here?). Oddly enough, there aren't that many of them in the Bay Area, so I need to make sure I have enough to last a while before we leave. I carry that letter from the doctor whenever I'm holding (I had the damn thing laminated), so we don't get pulled over and thrown in jail. That's all I need. I have a problem using the bathroom in other people's homes, let alone using an open toilet in front of a group of women and guards. I'd be plugged up for the duration.

One thing that's coming up is my "swimming with the dolphins" outing. I've always wanted to do it, and Sea World has a deal where you go to a class for a few hours to learn how to behave around them, and then you don a wetsuit and jump in the tank with them. I told Hubster to give me that for my birthday, so we're probably going to do it around late April/early May (before it gets really hot). I can't wait - it's a lifelong dream come true. Sea World is doing the "buy one day, get the rest of the year free" ticket deal again, so we'll take advantage of that. I love going there and seeing the whales. Now if only Disneyland would do that ...

I think that's all that's going on around here. I'll try and blog more frequently, more like I used to. I've been working with the voice program Laura told me about, but it takes time for it to learn your voice and mannerisms. You should see some of the sentences which pop out. It's easier than typing, though, and I might even get caught up on my email. Hang in there - if you have a letter coming, you'll get it.

It may be unintelligible, but you'll get something.

Sleet, Snow, and Sickness

WARNING: THIS POST IS LOADED WITH VERY BORING PICTURES.

If you choose to continue reading, I'm really happy to hear that. If you choose to shut this down, however, you will still show up as one of the cities who took the time to look at this piece of shit.

Thank you.

Hey! It's me! I bet you all thought I had finally kicked the bucket.

Nah... not this past month, anyway.

So what's new and exciting? Not much, really. The weather up here continues to confound the weathermen. They just can't seem to understand that we actually do exist and that our weather isn't the same as Los Angeles. I woke up to this the other day:





That's my front yard.





That's part of my backyard.





That's another part of my backyard.

As you can see from the date on the photos, this happened a few weeks ago. It happened the day before yesterday, too. And when it snows, someone goes apeshit.





Yep. It's the Flying Sausage. But she's just standing there, you say. She was taking a break from the racetrack:









She loves to run at full speed around the table. (You can tell it's really an action shot because her ears are flapping backwards.) She'll then run like mad into the house, make a turn around the coffee table, shoot back outside, and then race back inside, jump on the couch, and fall asleep for the rest of the day.

And then, at the end of the day when it stopped snowing this last time, this is what sunset looked like from my kitchen window:





That bright pink in the middle of the picture is the Pacific Ocean. People never believe me when I tell them we have an ocean view. You have to catch it when the air is clear, though.

Since only a few of you have seen my house, I figured I'd bore you with some pictures of it. This is the view of the stairs going down to the front room when you first walk in. If you go up the stairs to the left, the master and another bedroom are up there.





This is the front room looking out through the French doors onto the racetrack... uh... main deck:





Same room, different glass:





My fireplace, also in the front room:





That's where the wood is stacked. It even has a light in the top... why, I don't have a fucking clue.





What looks like a set of closet doors under the quilt (that's an antique - it's about 100 years old) is actually concealing a wet bar complete with a glass/booze cabinet and refrigerator. To the left of that quilt is the master; the other bedroom is to the right. The quilt hanging on the wall at the bottom of the picture was purchased at an auction to raise money for cancer research.





This is looking down the stairs leading to the lower level; i.e., the TV/knitting/sleeping/shithole room:









Some boring artwork:





And after chasing Emma, knitting, and watching court shows all day:





Whew. Enough of that.

Speaking of Emma, she's still limping. I think it's from all the activity. Bullies aren't known for their athletic prowess. We also just found out that our vet is a roaring drunk and mean to boot. I think we need to find another one. However, I do have some news which may impact our choice of vet.

We may be moving.

Come Thursday, we're driving up to the Bay Area for four days. On Friday, Hubster is going into the office and dropping me off at Stitches West (I'm going to partake of the festivities with a dear friend), so if you're there and I'm not on your shit list, come on up and say hey. Then we have to go to Mom's for Hubster's birthday dinner (his birthday is on Tuesday, the 23rd). On Saturday, I'm going back to Stitches and working in Rabbitch's booth; then Hubster is picking us up and dropping us off at some restaurant. I think getting plowed is also part of the evening's festivities. Then he'll pick us back up, take Rabbitch back to her hotel, and I'll most likely sleep on the drive to our motel. I'm thinking that going into San Francisco might be a grand idea. On Sunday, we're going to look at houses all day. I think we're looking in the Brentwood area - big houses with pools for reasonable prices and also home to Alpaca Direct. Finally, on Monday, we're going to see the kids and then head for home. The sausage will be with us, of course, although I don't know what we're going to do with her on Friday and Sunday. We might drop her off at Mom's while we're gone. Normally, we put her in her carrier, but we're going to be gone for hours. I don't like leaving her cooped up for that long.

I've got six pairs of socks on the needles for the trip, so I'll have a lot to work on. Only having one project going drives me apeshit. Hubster just looks at me in amazement and wonders how I keep everything straight (truth be told, I don't have a fucking clue which pattern goes with which sock - they all have the same number of stitches for the cuff).

The other big thing is that I dragged myself into the kitchen last week and fried chicken for dinner. We had two of our favorite people in the world over for dinner, and I wanted to make some comfort food. I wound up having to have one of them help me whisk the eggs, and I had to sit on my guitar stool in order to do the actual frying. Sigh. Things aren't going well with me personally, although our evening was incredible.

I'm slowing down. That's the sad truth, and I can feel it in every part of my body. My knees have arthritis in them and have been acting up (due to the cold, I'm sure). Headaches are an everyday occurrence now. I sleep in two to three hour bursts and rarely leave my chair. I'll be hobbling around Stitches with my walker, and I can honestly say that it will be the first time in almost two months that I've left the house. I'm depressed a lot of the time, but I try to not let on to Hubster. He's freaked out enough.

I'm so sorry for such a boring post (hence, the boring pictures to pad it). Otherwise, all I'd have to say is that I have a bad cold, feel like shit, am smoking more dope, and sleep/knit all day and night. If someone had told me that I'd be falling apart at this age, I would have laughed at them.

Better living through chemistry. And herbs.

She's Alive... Sorta

Yes, it's me. I bet a lot of you thought I had kicked the bucket. Nope, not yet. I'm too fucking mean to die before Stitches West.

This won't be a really long post because it's so difficult for me to type, but I was feeling guilty for not saying anything for so long. I'll try to do better in the future because I know how amusing I am and how much you all love reading my posts (snort).

I'll be opening the shop next week to sell the rest of the stash and my knitting bags, so if anybody wants a good deal on top-quality indie yarn and Green Mountain knitting bags, make sure to stop in. I've got too much stash left to take pictures of it all at once, but I'll put up as much as I can. Each skein will be $10, no matter what the yardage is, the fiber, or the artist who created it. As for the bags, I might set a price or take offers. We need the money, and I can't do any more shows, so...

Hubster was out of work for four months, but I'm happy to report that he started a new job a week ago. It was a large cut in pay, but at least we won't be homeless. I don't know if we'll be able to afford this house anymore, but I'm sure something will come up. One interesting thing which has happened is that my faith has increased dramatically. I'm sure that we'll wind up wherever we're meant to be.

Emma has something wrong with her legs - she's been limping quite a bit. We took her to the vet; he took X-rays and said that her bones look like shit (but so do most bulldogs), and is having us give her Advil or something like it. It seems to be helping; she's walking much better and is still my pudgy little helper. Right now, she's snuggled up against me and snoring like a thunderstorm. It's supposed to snow tonight - we're having a series of really intense storms all week - so I'm sure she'll be romping in it tomorrow.

My health is for shit, but what else is new? The dope I'm smoking (and the hash) help more than anything else I'm taking, but I don't use it unless I really need it. It does make watching TV a lot more fun. Gaining weight from all the cake, ice cream, Doritos, and other munchies I'm porking down is the bummer part of it.

My new tattoo is finished and looks great. I've decided that I'm going out with as much color as possible. It fits in with my flamboyant nature. Since this one is on my thigh, nobody can see it. If I'm still here next summer, it'll be visible at the bottom of the leg on my shorts - like I give a shit what anybody thinks.

Hubster did tell me that in August, we're going to Chicago for a week. I guess his new job has an annual meeting which he has to attend, so he's dragging me along. I haven't been there for 20 years, so it'll be a blast. I used to love partying there (and they've got the best cheeseburgers I've ever had, hands down), and I'm really looking forward to it. I have to find some good yarn shops, and if any of you live there and would like to have lunch, let me know. I think we'll be there the first week of that month. More details will follow.

I'll also be at Stitches West on the Friday of the show. I'm going with someone, but if anybody wants to meet up to say hey and maybe grab some grub, let me know that, too. I now have a stash thanks to some very kind and loving people, and I don't have money to shop with, but I want to see the show. It never hurts to drool. :)

So what else is new? Not a lot. We went to Disneyland for the day (it was great), had a nice Christmas (went to the Bay Area for a week), and I've been trying to knit. It hurts my hands a lot, but it's also good therapy. I owe some of you socks, so when you finally get them, they'll have a whole lot of love knit in them. My mom and grandmother are both cancer-free, so that's really great news. Oh! I do have news which I don't think I told you about. If I did, please forgive me for repeating myself.

It turns out that our daughter got married to The Lump and lost custody of the kids to my mother. Mom has temporary guardianship and has to go to court in February for permanent custody, and it looks really promising that she'll get it. Amber already has cancelled picking up the kids for one of her visits with them (Mom lets her have them every other weekend or something like that), so I think the novelty of having them has already worn off. She doesn't talk to us (Amber, not Mom), so I don't know what's going on in her life. Surprisingly, we don't miss her one little bit. Enough is enough.

My hands are about to fall off, so I'm going to close. I'll write more soon, I promise. I'll also confirm that the shop will be open next Monday, so save your pennies and help out an old, decrepit broad.

I love all of you. :)

Good Lord ...

... where has the time gone?

I took a look at the last time I posted and damn near fell off the couch. Lots of things have happened, so I'll try to cover as much as possible.

Hubster still isn't working, but he has a really good bite. Some company has a job opening which is a perfect fit for him; they're also really excited about having him come onboard. He has to work a "test day" with them (hopefully tomorrow), and then we'll see. I hope it comes through; we're running out of money, and the thought of living in a refrigerator box on Skid Row isn't exactly appealing to me, especially with the rainy season starting.

Health-wise, things aren't great. My hands and wrists look like balloons, and it hurts a lot to type or knit. I have a LOT of emails to answer - most of them thank you notes for gifts of yarn, notions, and even entire stock from the shop - and I'll answer all of the letters, but right now, I can barely get a letter written. I felt that I had to write a post, though - I've had people trying to be tactful in asking if I was still with you all! I'm here, although a little worse for wear. The good news is that I went to a doctor who prescribes medicinal marijuana and now have my certification letter. Our first stop after seeing her was to a dispensary. It was really strange how it came about. We were in a head shop in Hollywood and met this guy who runs a dispensary. He gave us the card for a doctor who works with him and got us in the next day. Not only that, even though his dispensary isn't accepting any new members, he told me that he would give us a membership. I was blown away by the place; neon lighting everywhere, clean as a whistle, and arranged like a deli. The difference was, of course, that instead of roast beef and pastrami, there were different grades of pot and hash. I left about a bill lighter but with enough supplies to last a while. Once you know what you're looking for, you see dispensaries and doctors who give the certifications everywhere. It sure helps with the pain, so I've been smoking about a bowl a night and a little during the day (I have daytime and nighttime grades of the stuff). I feel like I'm 14 again. Yeah, I know... I was an early bloomer. That's not the only thing I began doing at 14, but I'm sure you can guess what that was. The problem was, I didn't know shit about how a dick worked. I thought it moved by itself - like a piston. The first one I ever saw, I thought was broke. That's a story for another day, though ...

The bike hasn't sold, so we're keeping it. Hubster is going to learn to ride, and I'll ride behind him. That wasn't the original plan, but it's better than nothing. We might put a sidecar on it, too. That way, I can ride alone. I told him that if we go the sidecar route, we'll get Emma a leather helmet and goggles, and I'll hold her while we ride. Talk about causing accidents on the freeway ...

What else, what else .... If we're fortunate enough to be able to stay here and buy this house, we're going to turn the downstairs into an apartment for me. There's already a full bath which just needs to be finished, another room which can be my bedroom, and the large room for watching TV. There's also a fire pit where I'd like to put a fireplace since it gets so cold down here in the winter. It would be ideal, especially since I can't make it up stairs very well. We'll see what happens. This house has so much potential that even though I'd love to move back home, we couldn't afford anything even remotely like it. I've got too much shit for a small house - and thanks to many of you, a fantastic stash again - that I need a larger house. I've also got the kids. Oh... that's what has happened. I am NOT pleased with this development ...

Our daughter showed up at Mom's house with her boyfriend, his parents, and the police and took the kids away. They were crying and clinging to Mom, terrified to leave. Amber didn't give a shit. I was right all along; she doesn't want them other than to use as pawns. So Mom has filed a court case against Amber to gain custody. They go to court next Monday. I want to be there, but if Hubster starts a new job, we can't. It's probably best, because I'd strangle her. Mom has only seen them once, and she said they were dirty, had lost weight, and were afraid to come to her. Then today, Social Services shows up at Mom's to check on Grandma. Another ruse; Amber is obviously trying to show that Mom is too old to take care of them. It backfired, though. Nasty little bitch will get hers.

I think that's enough for now. My hands are barely working, so it's time to go rest. I'll be in touch soon, I promise. Thank you again to those of you who have sent letters, shown your love, and been there for me. I won't forget it.

I think it's time to fire up a bowl, put "Up" in the DVD player, and try to knit. Of course, I don't know what the sock will look like.

Maybe like a penis that works like a piston ...

New Post to Come by Tomorrow

I'm so sorry for this enormous delay in posting, but I wanted to let you all know that I'll have one for you by the time you get up tomorrow morning. See you then!

The Summit - Continued

I think I left out a bunch of stuff in my last post, so I decided to bore you further with some more details about my fun and games before, during, and after the show.

Most of you know that I'm barely able to walk most days, so first, I want to give big thanks and hugs to my beloved Hubster and my booth mate, Kate of Spindle Cat Studio, for not only setting up my booth, but also for all the help they provided during the show. I couldn't have done it without you guys (especially when we got really busy). I sat on my little folding chair while you guys wrote up orders, helped customers, and did the myriad chores that come along with doing a show. Don't get me wrong - I didn't just sit on my ass looking gorgeous uh... fat and dumpy... but there's no way in hell it was a one-woman operation.

That done... on to the dish.

It was absolutely amazing to me the number of people who knew who I was. To be sure, I kind of stand out in a crowd, but I was still floored by how many people came up to me and greeted me by name or told me that they were looking forward to meeting me in person. Talk about an ego booster! Then there were all the lovely people who read my blog and wanted to meet me, foul mouth and all. I was able to get up and walk around two or three times, and it was then that I met even more wonderful people. I would stand in front of a booth, wait until they looked up, and then watch the recognition dawn in their eyes. Lots of hugs, some crying, and people whom I've considered family for years. Too good.

I may have said it before, but a lot of vendors were complaining about the number of customers who came through the marketplace. We had heard numbers ranging from 6,000 to over 10,000, so I think many of us packed accordingly. I know that I brought way too many goods for the estimated numbers, but I would rather have too much than not enough. There were vendors whose booths were almost empty and others whose booths were bursting at the seams with items for sale. I also saw a lot of shoppers with no bags or goodies (other than the freebies) just walking around. I know that none of the people who put this thing together even know who I am, but I want to put in a good word for all of them. They accomplished an incredible feat - from getting all the teachers togethers (all that talent in one room!), to giving the vendors a place to shine, to offering goods not usually seen. This being my first show, I wasn't sure what to expect, but I was delighted with it. I even had the Yarn Harlot open the door and hold it open for me as I lurched forward into the room. I didn't know what to say, so I blurted out, "You're the Yarn Harlot", to which she replied, "So I've been told!". I loved it so much, in fact, that...

In a minute.

The couple of times I did get up, I managed to do a fair amount of damage (so it's a good thing that I couldn't get out more). I got a set (sizes 1 to 5) of Signature Needle Arts DPN's (even though I now use Hiya Hiya 9" circs as much as possible) because I've been drooling over them since they came out, and some incredible yarn from a couple of vendors (as usual, I can't remember who the hell I bought it all from). Then there was the mysterious skein of yarn waiting for me from Berocco when I returned. They specifically asked the lovely lady helping out in my booth to make sure that I got it. I'm not sure what they want me to do with it - whether they want me to try it out or just to see it - but it was a honor for me to receive it. It's absolutely lovely - beautiful colors, easy to knit, plenty of yardage - and I've got a pair of socks slated for it. I've got some other socks I have to do first, but they're in the queue.

So that was my experience at the show, and I hope that when/if we make it to Stitches West, it will be as much fun.

Back to home matters...

I intimated last post that I was getting another tattoo. I had no idea of where to look for an artist out here (it's amazing how many artists there are in LA), so I wound up on Yelp looking for recommendations. I found a place called Studio City Tattoo and, as usual, we were late, but off we headed. It's about a two-hour drive there (they're in West Hollywood) and we were terribly late, so I spoke to my artist about what I wanted, gave him the draft, and made an appointment for him to actually do the work. That appointment was yesterday (Saturday night), but we couldn't go because there's a huge fire at the base of the mountain we live on; in case we had to evacuate, we wanted to be home for that. Anyway, my new appointment is next Saturday afternoon. And what am I getting?

The Sock Summit logo. Right on my thigh. I was going to get it on my ass, but that's so saggy and wrinkly and bumpy that it would look like a cheap decal which had come off and been stuck back on. Why that logo? Because it was my first show, it was so wonderful for me, I made so many new friends and finally met old ones, that it carries enormous significance for me. It may sound silly to everybody else, but I don't give a shit. It's my body, and since I don't know how much longer I have to inhabit it, I'm going to decorate it any way I see fit. So there.

Hollywood is a kick in the ass, especially at night. People think that San Francisco is weird? Heh. Not compared to this place. Hit Hollywood Blvd. on a weekend night, and you see things that are just incredible. There are people who dress up like superheroes willing to take their picture with you (for a hefty price, of course), the Kodak Theater, Graumann's (now the Mann), El Capitan, and the Kodak Theater (where the Oscars are). Angelenos LOVE their donuts, it would seem - there's a shop on every corner - so I just have to find the best one and have Hubster bring a box to the parlor while I'm being worked on. And then there's Pink's, the famous hot dog stand which has been there since the 40's, I think, and who makes one of the best hot dogs I've ever had. I would love to walk up and down the street on a Saturday night, but there's that walking issue. Maybe if Hubster holds me up...

We're still sorting everything out, getting the shop put back together, getting payments ready for everybody, trying to get things ready to send out - holy shit, it's a lot of work. I have a meeting for the Haunted Town here this coming Friday night (leave it to me to open my big fucking mouth and volunteer for something), so I have to have some semblance of order in the house by then. That's okay, though - it will light a fire under my big saggy ass to get all this finished. So I think I'll knit tonight (I'm really, really tired) and get to working on it again tomorrow.

Hubster is still looking for work, and I'm beginning to get a little nervous. I've come to really love our home and this town, and I think we're going to have to leave it. Of course, if he tells me that we have to live near the ocean in San Diego, I think I can manage the transition, but I really don't want to leave the state. I'm worried about finances, about finding a house, about finding a new doctor... the list goes on and on. He's looking, but with this shitty economy, I just don't know. I don't want to have to live with my mother again (Hubster has horrible allergies to cats, and her house is full of them), but we'll do what we need to. Fuck.

I'm waiting on whether or not for word if I need to drive back up to the Bay Area for my aunt. I know that she's going to be cremated and laid to rest in the Pacific Ocean, but my cousin Glenn is having a get-together at his house. I would love to go and see family and friends whom I haven't seen in years, but I also do NOT want to see my ex-boyfriend (who remained a family friend), especially since I'm fat, bald, and look like a biker chick. Oh, to ride up on my bike and scare the shit out of the weasely little fuck...

So I think that's about all that's going on around here, other than the fires. There are three huge ones, including one at the base of the mountain I live on top of and one that now encompasses about 65 square miles (the Station Fire). We don't have the biggest one, nor do we have mandatory evacuations, but it's large enough to stay put and not go away from the house. At one point, one of the ingress/egress highways (there are only two of them) was shut down; even though it's open now, if we can't get to Emma to save her, well... I can't even go there.

Off to knit. I have a lot to do, and never enough time to do it all. Life is a whirlwind of activity right now, and I don't know which direction to turn. Add to that the heat (close to 100 degrees), and I'm not a happy camper most days.

But then again, I have a reputation to uphold. Happy?

Not if I'm going to retain Queen Bitch status.

The Summit - and Other Stuff

Well, we're finally home from Sock Summit. What a trip, both figuratively and literally! Let's talk about it, shall we?

But first, more bad news. I just got a call from Mom telling me that my aunt has died. I called my cousin and talked to him for an hour. She had COPD and died peacefully in her sleep at 4:45 a.m. He's looking for her papers to see what her last wishes were. So far, he's found one from 2002 saying that she didn't want any services, just to be cremated and floated out on the Pacific Ocean. I don't know yet if I need to drive up there again or not. I didn't know she was so sick; otherwise, we would have gone to see her while we were visiting my mom. Glenn lives in the town next-door. We had left about two days too early. Glenn had moved her into his house and was using hospice. He was shocked when he found out I lived near Los Angeles. Anyway, I'll post if I need to leave again;

On to the show news.

Rather than rent one of those huge, uncomfortable trucks, we had a ball installed on our truck (it turns out that we had a towing package already installed on it - who knew?) and got a trailer instead. It was a lot less expensive, and Hubster was able to pack everything into it just fine. We bought those Space Bags - the ones you suck all the air out of with a vacuum cleaner - to put all the yarn in (worked like a charm and saved a lot of space), labeled the boxes we put everything else into, and just filled it up. Then we hooked it up to the truck and actually got out of here at a decent time.

We made it up to the Bay Area the first day and visited with my family. It was so nice to see them, and we got to spend a lot of time with the kids. Then it was off to Portland the next day. We made it up there by early evening, checked into our motel, and fell asleep pretty early. The next day, we slept in and then went over to the Convention Center to unload. I had a really difficult time with it. Hubster went over first to get started, and I tried to walk over (he got ready before me and wanted to started). I'm barely able to walk now, so I had to stop every few hundred feet to stop and rest. I finally made it over, and found that he had unloaded everything by that time. We went over so I could see the booth; I realized that we should have gotten twice to amount of space, so I freaked out about that. We were just leaving when I saw a petite, beautiful woman heading towards me. Who was it?

Rabbitch.

The first of my gang of miscreants had arrived! We slobbered all over each other, gave each other lots of hugs, and checked out each other's goodies. It was SO nice to finally meet her! We made plans to meet up the next day and headed back to our hotels.

The next day, we were at the Center bright and early to set up. This being our first show, we had no idea of what we were doing, but my boothmate, Kate of Spindle Cat Studio (also a show virgin) was there too; between me, her, and Hubster, we were able to get everything set up. I truly saw the need for more space then. Remember how I was so afraid that I wouldn't have enough stuff to fill the booth? Heh. I'll be renting two 10 ft. booths for Stitches West (yes, I'm doing that show). I think the booth looked great. Did I remember my camera? Nope. Did I remember my phone has a camera on it? Nope. Too much to think about. Then the classes let out, and it was show time for the students.

We had a good crowd, but nothing horrible. I figured the next day, we'd have a lot more people. Back to the motel for rest and then to the center the next day to meet the public.

I was shocked to find a huge line stretching down the aisle for my booth. They were there to buy the winning Ravelry yarn. I sold out of them in three minutes flat. Talk about bedlam! Then we got all the people who wanted it and whom we had to turn away (at least for those items). The booth was busy all day, though, and we sold a lot of things. Oh... you remember my using the iPhone as my credit card machine? It worked like a charm.

I heard a lot of vendors complaining about how slow it was, the lack of traffic and sales, and how the projected numbers were way off. What I noticed is that some booths had no business while others were constantly busy. I'm not sure why - there didn't seem to be any rhyme or reason for it, but it was true. We were truly blessed. In fact, I hardly got out to see any of the other booths. I did get to meet many of the other miscreants in my posse - Mrs. Q, Jen of Woolgirl, and a bunch of other broads (ladies? I think not), so I was a happy broad myself.

On one of the breaks I took, I ran into Ron from Buffalo Gold. After a smoking break conversation, he asked me if I would design socks for them. So now I'm the exclusive sock designer for BG and was sent home with a buffalo/bamboo blend to play with and come up with a design for them. I'll also be going to their ranch in Ft. Worth and to some other huge convention in Denver in February. Too exciting! I'm really looking forward to all this. Now I just have to actually come up with the pattern... I'll be doing lace socks in a very fine gauge for my first pair. I also met Cecil, his dad. They're a wonderful family, and I'm looking forward to getting to know them better.

Lots of other things happened, but I'll save those for my next post. I do want to say that we took Emma with us, and when Hubster took her out to go potty or just for a walk, he had women running up to him asking if that was Emma. He told them yes, and they went nuts meeting her! I was an afterthought - they asked if I was at the show since Emma was there - and she got more love and attention than she's ever received. I'm glad she was such a hit; she needs the socialization. Being such a loving dog, she was very happy to meet everyone. I kept telling Hubster that we should have said she was a service dog and put a back cover on her with our name and booth number on it. I really would have had good sales then!

I don't know what's considered a good take, but we took in about $6K. For our first show, I was thrilled! I can see why the other vendors were complaining, though - some of our lines sold very well, while others just sat there. All in all, it was a fantastic experience. I'll write more about it in the next installment, along with news of my new tattoo.

Off to work on Mt. Yarnsuvius. It's kind of like Chinese food - the more I take out of the pile to put away, the more it seems to grow.

It just doesn't taste as good.

Off to Sock Summit!

I just wanted to tell you that we're leaving tomorrow for Sock Summit. Wow, that snuck up on me! I'm not even ready or done with inventory. NOOOO!!!!!!! And here I thought I would be able to relax this weekend. Fat chance. I'll be tagging and bagging right up until I hit the show floor; then I'll be able to rest when we leave to go home. I think that a lot of the other show participants are in the same boat as I am. Now Hubster is sick from the stress. Great. I have to keep working, though. Oh well... I should be thankful that he's even helping at all.

As of now, the shop is closed down and will reopen some tine after August 12th. Please do not try to place orders during our absence; I won't be looking at email and will have the shop "with me".

Well, that was surreal. I was going to knit for an hour, sleep for an hour, and then get up. That was at 8:00 a.m. It's now 10:30 a.m., and I just woke up. So much for knitting.

Time for coffee and to get Hubster up. Hopefully, he'll be in a good mood. Today is inventory day, shrink-wrap the yarn, get a trailer hitch on the truck, pray that the trailer we rented is big enough, make sure we have everything, blah blah blah. Then it's to bed early tonight and hit the road by 9 a.m. Oh boy - road trip!


See you either at the show or back here on August 12th!

Projects Galore... and Some Other Things

I came to a decision the other day. Rather than work for hours at a time on Sock Summit, I'm going to work on it for a while, then knit, then work, then knit, etc. That way, I won't burn out on anything. Smart idea, huh?

No.

It's been so long since I've actually had more than one project on the needles (and one of them a shawl, no less), that I'm having way too much fun for it to be legal. And that translates into wanting to do nothing but knit - no work on Sock Summit, no reading, no sleeping, no eating, nothing... other than knitting.

So what the hell am I doing that I'm finding so much fun?

Well, you all know that I have a dear knitting sister (the darling lady who started out as a customer) for whom I knit socks. She started the whole thing off because I was late with her order and put some additional skeins of yarn in her package. Well, she was so blown away that she wanted to knit me some socks. Then I wanted to knit her some socks (the pair that I posted a picture of earlier). Now I have two pairs on the needles for her - the ones you saw a picture of (I had spilled a cup of coffee on them, but luckily found another skein in my stash). The other pair is a surprise, but I will say that they're killer good-looking - a pair of a simple Fair Isle-type made with a solid and a variegated. They're just too cool. Then I have another friend I'm making a very special pair of socks for. She had helped me through a bad time a while ago, so I wanted to thank her. This pair is intricate and will take me a while. They're beaded diagonally on the cuff with about 700 size 8/0 glass seed beads. I've done a pattern with the colors of the beads (there are five colors to match the colors in the yarn) and have to be careful that both socks are identical. That means a lot of Post-It Notes on my pattern. But it's fun stringing them, and I think they'll be gorgeous. Since I know she doesn't read my blog, I can tell you that the yarn is Anne by Schaefer; the color is an ivory with splotches of gold, green, purple, and wine. The beads are the same color except that I also have clear thrown in there. When I'm done with them, I'll post a picture.

As for the shawl, it's for my grandmother. It's a deep wine color with gold running through the yarn. The pattern isn't difficult - it's leaves done in lace - and I think even I can memorize it The yarn is Dream in Color Classy (I think that's what it's called - it's basically Smooshy with the gold metallic). She'll like to have it to throw over her shoulders since she gets cold in the evenings. I'm brining all these projects with me to Sock Summit to work on during my spare time. Ha! I have a feeling that I won't have any spare time, even after the day is over. Let's hope I don't, anyway. Spare time during the day means no sales; spare time at night means that I'm not tired because I wasn't busy during the day. I think it's going to go well, though. Even Hubster is looking forward to it. I know Emma is, too. She has to have a good grooming this week - maybe on Friday - so she's pretty for when she meets all of you who are going. :) Speaking of the M, here's a picture of the human dog.





Hubster is sick as a dog (not Emma... just in general). I think the stress from the loss of his job finally hit. He went to bed at 9:30 p.m., and I doubt I'll see him any time soon. We have nothing to do tomorrow other than work on the inventory for the Summit, so he'll get a good night's sleep. We're also going to go look at houses for sale around here. I'm a firm believer in some people being able to manifest things (and I know I'm one of them), so I'm going to behave as if we have all the money in the world. I picked out about 10 houses to go see. Hell, I don't even know where we'll end up, but it won't hut a thing to go take a look. I think once he gets some leads, he'll feel much better. He has people working on his behalf at Cisco to bring him back, but we'll see. I think he should start his own company, but it's his career, and I don't want to push him into doing anything.

I had a bit of excitement this morning. It was about 5:00 a.m., and I was sitting in my chair merrily knitting away. It was then that I noticed a rather large bug crawl up the side of the fire pit (we have a big carpeted hole in the TV room in front of a gas wall fireplace where you can sit and knit, read, etc.). Anyway, this thing stopped when it reached the top, raised it's head, and arched it's tail over it's back. Then it hit me like a brick what it was.

A SCORPION.

I damn near shit my jammies. It was a baby, but they can sting just as badly as an adult. I couldn't believe it. We're way above the desert floor, so how on earth did it get up here?

I went running up the stairs as fast as I could and woke Hubster up. I don't think he believed me at first, but down he came armed with ant spray. He rolled the TV out of the way (I had thrown a book at the thing and missed, so it ran under the TV), and there it was. He sprayed the living shit out of it, then slammed a book down on it repeatedly until he was sure it was dead. Then he wrapped it up in paper towels and shoved it down to the bottom of the garbage can. Since Emma is now eating creatures and has always eaten bugs, he didn't want her to get it. I'm now creeping around the house because I'm terrified of them. In all the years he lived in Phoenix/Mesa/Tempe/Scottsdale, he's never seen one in a house or in the wild. I think he was ready to shit, too. They're evil-looking fuckers. Now I'm curled up in my chair keeping vigilant watch over the room lest another one comes creeping in.

In other yarn news, Laura of Drooling Over Yarn is knitting a pair of sockies for me. She's so sweet!! She's also a fast and excellent knitter, so I know they'll come soon. I plan on showing them off and letting everyone know who made them and what the yarn is. I have the privilege of showing off many of the contest entries for Ravelry in my booth, and hers is one of them. I've already made it clear that I'm purchasing it for myself. She dyes the most exquisite yarn. If you haven't seen her work, don't hesitate to go to my store or over to Etsy. I've felt like such a failure with the shop this past year - bad sales, no interest, spending every spare cent I have on advertising, etc., and not having anybody come look - that Sock Summit is my last chance to do right by all the artists who put their trust in me. I've still got boxes of work which some artists want back, and I want to get them mailed out, but there's money problems, the usual health problems, blah blah blah. Most of the artists have been very kind and understanding, although a few of them have been downright nasty. I guess I can't blame them, but when I'm accused of being a thief, that's crossing the line. I'm really hiding. Blow me.

One last thing - we may have a nibble on the bike! A man called last week and is very interested in coming to see it. He was coming Friday, but after he was about five hours late, I'm afraid I left a rather nasty voice mail message. Come to find out, someone in his family died. I felt about five inches tall. I'm writing him a letter apologizing for being such an ass. Since we're leaving a week from today (!?!!?!?!?!), I'm going to try and get him to come by later this week. That would be so wonderful to sell it before we leave. Then I can go shopping at the Summit!! Uh... I mean... we can save the money. Yeah... that's the ticket.

Off to go wind some yarn so I can cast on for another project. All I have to do is find the yarn I want. Unfortunately, it's right where the scorpion crawled out from.

It may have to wait until Hubster gets up

I'm Ready to Explode

You know, there are days when things are so fantastic that you can't believe your good luck. Then there are days when things are so shitty, you can't figure out what you did for the karma gods to take a big dump on your face.

A few days ago, things were fantastic.

I got a call from the doctor - the long-awaited call with the results of my spinal tap. There is no indication of cancer (bone or otherwise), the things floating in the fluid are little pieces of the damaged discs (expected), and it appears that the auto-immune crap has stopped for the time being. What does all that mean? It means that I don't have cancer and am in remission. We were both so happy that it seemed as if we had finally made it over some hump. Then it all came to a screeching halt today.

Hubster told me last night that Cisco was giving a lot of people the axe today because they're trying to save money by getting rid of groups and highly-paid employees. He thought he was safe because he didn't get an email telling him to report to HR for a meeting. I guess whenever you see someone from HR in a meeting, it's not a good thing. He did, however, have his weekly one-on-one with his bitch boss. So at 11:30 a.m., he went into his meeting. At 11:35 a.m., he came back downstairs, looked at me, and said, "Well." Huh? Then he finished the statement:

"I lost my job."

WHAT? WHAT?????????? After giving 15 years to that fucking company, all the vacations we couldn't take because he had to finish a project, all the times he stayed up working all night, all the trips we had to take the computer on because he had to work... well, you get the picture. He developed a tool way back when which was meant just for him. It turned out to be something which the entire company used. Hubster tried to copyright it (that would have meant Easy Street for us), but we were told that since a year had passed and the company was using it, it was no longer available for copyright. That little tool is still being used today and has saved the company BILLIONS (yes, that is millions with a "b") of dollars. Did we see a cent of it? Nope. In fact, I think that year he got a less than stellar review. This year, he didn't even get a bonus because they were trying to save money so they wouldn't have to lay anybody off. I'm telling him to tell them that since he's been canned, they obviously didn't save any money, so he wants his bonus. Shit. We did NOT need this right now.

The only decent thing about it is that he gets six months of severance: two months of work and four months of job searching. As far as he's concerned, his job ended at 11:35 this morning. For the first time in years, he's not working. In fact, he's not doing shit tonight. Neither am I. We're both in shock. I think it will sink in tomorrow.

So I called my mother to tell her, and the first thing she said was, "What are we going to do?". We? I pointed that out, and she said that she didn't mean to sound cold, but we owed her money. I came unglued and told her not to mention certain things to Hubster, to leave him alone, and that he wasn't going to be talking to her for at least a few days. After that fiasco of a phone call, I told Hubster that now we know why we moved down here. Silicon Valley is going to be a sea of empty houses because there will be thousands of people with the same skill sets looking for work, and there are no jobs available. Most of the companies are outsourcing to India or bringing in unskilled young people. They're getting rid of women over 40 and highly-paid engineers like Hubster - the people who built the company. They raped us and are now disposing of us like a used tampon. The people coming in won't know what the fuck they're doing, and they'll get paid dick (but to them, it will seem like a fortune). Down here, there are a lot of job opportunities, and Hubster is also toying with the idea of starting his own company. We also have the option of moving out of state, which I would hate to do, but I go where he goes. This is just so fucked up that I'm immobilized.

Enough of that shit. Let's talk about something a little more enjoyable.

I just got approved for a credit card machine for Sock Summit today. I didn't go through a bank, which means I didn't get one of those portable hand-held machines. I've seen those things fail miserably, especially inside concrete buildings. No, I went with my iPhone. They have a contract with a company who handles the transactions. I just type in the numbers of the card, and it gives me instant approval/declined. In fact, it works just like every other credit card machine except that it does more. I can sync it up with my computer, and it automatically records the sales, removes the items from inventory, transfers money directly into my checking account, etc. I applied for it last night and was approved today, so I bought the applications this afternoon and downloaded them onto my phone. At least that went right.

I also got my bike listed. Sigh. At least I rode it onto the driveway, gunned the engine (wow!), and almost dumped the damn thing because our driveway slopes down, and I was sideways. But we got the pictures taken, I filled out all the forms, and now I just keep my fingers crossed that someone will want her. She's such a gorgeous piece of machinery. But especially now, with Hubster having lost his job, we need to simplify. So much for saving money and looking at other houses.



There's my hot bitch.



Another picture of the sexy beast.

I had to start that sock over - the picture in the post before the questionnaire - because I dumped an entire cup of coffee on it, and it was totally destroyed. It was okay , though. I'm using this killer yarn from an artist I found who is coming onboard in the shop - the colors are incredible, and the way everything blends and flows makes it look as if it's moving and breathing. With the design of the sock, it's going to be incredible. This is for a customer who has become a sister, and we seem to be making each other socks all the time LOL. I just got the final element for a really special pair for her. I might cast on for those tonight, as well as another pair (I can't say too much because she reads the blog). I'm in the mood to cast on a bunch of projects. I'm sure there are many of you who feel the same way.

Things are beginning to pour in for Sock Summit. I got about 10 packages yesterday (well, so three of them were for me), and I'm expecting about 30 more. I don't think I'm going to add anything new to the shop before we leave; it's a waste of time and effort, since I have to put everything in a spreadsheet for SS. If I weren't taking the shop, then I would; however, since the shop is going with me, it's double the effort. Besides, this will give me a lot more stock and will also sell my artists' work a lot more efficiently.

So that's what's going on. I've been sitting at this damn computer all day, so now I'm going to go knit for the rest of the evening. We have a new ant invasion upstairs and I can't find the spray, so Hubster will have to deal with it when he gets home. Poor guy. If he's not cleaning up a mess at work, he's cleaning up one here.

Oh wait. He doesn't work anymore.

That one is going to take some time getting used to. Shit.

SP 14 Questionnaire

Okay, fun lovers... here is the information you've been waiting for so you can send me lots of lovely hand-crafted gifts and spoil me rotten.

(I didn't type that. Hubster did.)

1. What is/are your favorite yarn/s to knit with? What fibers do you absolutely *not* like? Indie yarns, usually off Etsy. My favorite is merino or merino blended with Tencel, bamboo, alpaca, or some other luxury fiber which still keeps it at fingering weight. No acrylic, please (not even in a blend). I don't care if it's superwash or not - I wash everything by hand anyway.

2. What do you use to store your needles/hooks in? I have cases for my DPN's and circulars which I stick in whatever knitting bag I'm using.

3. How long have you been knitting & how did you learn? Would you consider your skill level to be beginner, intermediate or advanced? I've been knitting for 49 years. I learned from my grandmother, my next-door neighbor, and other relatives. If I'm not advanced in both years and experience by now, I never will be.

4. Do you have an Amazon or other online wish list? No.

5. What's your favorite scent? Lavender or patchouli.

6. Do you have a sweet tooth? Favorite candy? Never touch the stuff.

7. What other crafts or Do-It-Yourself things do you like to do? Do you spin? I do, but I don't have time to do it. Besides, I have more than enough fiber. The only thing I do anymore is knit.

8. What kind of music do you like? Can your computer/stereo play MP3s? (if your buddy wants to make you a CD) Classic rock, although I knit to TV, not to music, so no CD's, please.

9. What's your favorite color(s)? Any colors you just can't stand? I love all colors, especially those gorgeous indie blends. I like the glitz yarns, too - the ones with silver in them.

10. What is your family situation? Do you have any pets? An English bulldog named Emma. She likes to eat my DPN's, especially the black walnut ones which I can't get anymore.

11. Do you wear scarves, hats, mittens or ponchos? No.

12. What is/are your favorite item/s to knit? Socks.

13. What are you knitting right now? Socks.

14. Do you like to receive handmade gifts? Yes! They're the best!

15. Do you prefer straight or circular needles? Bamboo, aluminum, plastic? I use black walnut DPN's (or the ones by Grafton Fibers - Pretty Petals or some such thing); I also use circs (Addi Lace Turbo or the 11" Hiya Hiya)... I've got tons of each, though, so I really don't need any.

16. Do you own a yarn winder and/or swift? I have them both.

17. How old is your oldest UFO? About six months old.

18. What is your favorite holiday? What winter holiday do you observe? My birthday. We observe Christmas for the family, but both Hubster and I are Pagan. I follow Native American spirituality.

19. Is there anything that you collect? Yarn, of course! Fingering weight only, please. Oh... and any cool notion (although I think I have them all), hand-thrown pottery, and Green Mountain Knitting Bags.

20. Any books, yarns, needles or patterns out there you are dying to get your hands on? What knitting magazine subscriptions do you have? I think I subscribe to every magazine on the horizon (just check out my renewal bills). As for patterns, the last time I checked, I had about 300. I don't think I need any more. :)

21. Are there any new techniques you'd like to learn? No.

22. Are you a sock knitter? What are your foot measurements? Yes. My foot is 10.5" long and 10.25" in circumference (at the ball of my foot); however, I usually make socks smaller in circumference (down to 9" or 9.25", especially if it's a lace pattern) so they're not baggy. I wear a size 10 shoe.

23. When is your birthday? June 23. Yes, I just had a birthday, so let the good times roll.

24. Are you on Ravelry? If so, what's your ID? Yes. pjyarngoddess

I also own Yarny Goodness, so I tend to buy a lot of things for myself from the shop. Maybe if I stopped buying myself so many things, I'd sell more.

If you have any questions, don't hesitate to ask me. I'm a smart-ass, but I did try to answer everything as accurately as possible.

Thank you!

I Just Can't Catch a Break

So Tuesday was the third and last series of shots. We headed down to Rancho Mirage in 112 degree heat (god, I HATE the desert), got all signed in, and then waited a short time until it was time for the nurse to do my write-up. I answered all her questions, and then she asked me if anything was different or had changed in the past two weeks. I told her that I had lost 20 pounds in a week and was barfing every night - all night. She looked at me funny and went to talk to the doctor. Then she came back, told me to go have a ciggie while I waited for the procedure, and that was that.

I had barely finished my ciggie when the PA came out and told me they were ready for me. I was led into one of the operating suites and went to lay down on the table. That's when things changed.

I can't remember the PA's name, but I've had him before and he's really nice. He told me that they were doing another procedure and that I'd have to sit up with my forearms on my thighs. I asked him what was going on, and he said that the doc was going to do a spinal tap. I had to sit like that so my spine was curved, thereby allowing access to my spine.

A what? A SPINAL TAP???? Oh no. Oh no no no. I've heard those things hurt. I asked him if it was absolutely necessary and why the doctor was doing one. He didn't know, but he told me that the doctor was good at them and not to worry. Sigh. Why couldn't it be the band that was coming to play or something?

The doc came in the room all cheery and happy, and I asked him why he was about to torture me. You have to realize that this man is always happy and usually banters with you while he's sticking you full of needles. He got serious and told me that he needed to check something. Shit. Then he told me to breathe slowly and deeply, and to just relax and not move. Then I felt it.

I am here to tell you that spinal taps make those steroid shots feel like a massage. I thought I was going to pass out, but it was over in about five minutes. Then he held up the vial for me to see. The fluid was clear and viscous with little things floating in it. He went, "Hmmm" as he looked at it. I asked him what the floating things were, and he said that's what the lab was going to find out. Then he said that something was a definite possibility, and even if it turned out to not be so, he wanted me to be prepared. I looked at him and said, "Prepared for what? What do you think is wrong?". Then he told me.

Bone cancer.

On top of the other shit.

OH FUCK.

I sort of went blank after that. I didn't even feel the steroid shots. He wants me to see another doctor pronto and gave me a list to see if my insurance covers any of them. We'll find out in a couple of weeks if I do have bone cancer. If I do, then I have some hard decisions to make. In the meantime, I'm trying to ignore it. I'm actually the calmest one in the family. My poor mother is falling apart, and Hubster is having a difficult time, too. But I've sort of come to the realization that I'm terminal anyway, so what's one more thing? Besides, I may not even have it.

So that was the fun and games I got to experience at the doctor's office.

On Monday, we went to Sea World in the evening for my belated birthday outing. They have a new thing this year where they're open until 11 p.m. Because we got there late, we only got to see one show - the Shamu Rocks! show - but it was way cool. We went on some rides, got soaked, took the sky tram over Mission Bay (stunning - I'd sell my soul to live in San Diego), and looked at a bunch of stuff. The neat thing is that our tickets are good for the rest of the year. All I have to do is order an ECV and a parking pass online at least three days before we go (to ensure that I get a scooter), and we can go every day if we want and not pay admission. A lot of the parks down here are doing similar things. The economy has hit them all hard (with what they charge to get in, I'm surprised that they get any business at all), so they're trying all kinds of gimmicks. Southern California residents also get special consideration and special deals. I want the Disneyland pass - that's my happy place - but I won't go until the fall. It's too hot and there are too many kids right now for my comfort zone.

Emma is glued to me like flies on shit. I can't go to the bathroom without her suddenly bolting up from a dead sleep and walking ahead of me. What's so endearing is that if I fall on the stairs, she's right there licking my face as if I were a puppy, trying her best to save me. Then she walks ahead of me on the stairs in case I fall again. I guess she figures she can break my fall and protect me, and she probably can. Speaking of the M, here's a new picture of her:





I was sitting in my knitting chair right next to her. I had made a sound or something, and she went on full alert. She looks a little different than she did as a puppy, doesn't she?

My current knitting project is a pair of socks for a lady who was a customer (and still is), but has now become more like a sister. She knitted me two pairs of socks (I have to get pictures of them on here) and included two gifts with them. This is the third time I've started these damned things because I fucked up on frogging them (lace is such a bitch to rip back), and then got mad and cut the sock free from the ball - twice. This is why I always buy two skeins, unless the yardage is WAY above 400 yards. Here's a picture of the first one. Enjoy!





The yarn is by Neighborhood Fiber Co. I can't remember the name of the color, but it's her colors. I normally don't knit with a tight twist yarn, but it knits like a dream. Once you stretch it out, it looks totally different. I sent her this picture to see if she liked the colors and pattern, but I purposely didn't stretch it out so she has something to look forward to. I think she likes it. :)

One of the new artists who is coming onboard is called "lightbrownhare". Wait until you see her yarn. You're all going to shit a major brick. I've already bought something like eight skeins, I think. All but one of them is tight twist. Hmm... maybe I've turned some corner and am becoming something other than what I thought. Anyway, check her out on Etsy. She does two skeins in the dyepot of the type of yarn I've been buying - one with 400 yards and the other with 600 yards (you all know which one I bought), and each is different not only in design, but in saturation. I have to stop talking about her - I'm getting the urge to go shopping.

I'm also doing something new in the shop. I'm instituting an "Artist of the Month". My first artist is Laura Neal of "Drooling Over Yarn". There will be an interview (and hopefully a picture) of her on the shop site by the end of the weekend. Oh... and I extended the sale through Sunday night in honor of the holiday.

I can't believe that in a month, we'll be on the road to Portland. I've been getting stock for the show, and I think we're going to have more than enough. I'm also working on the shop this weekend. I should be out of pain from those damned shots by then. Tonight, I have to pull three orders and then knit on the sock.

I think I've blathered on long enough. I hope you all have a wonderful holiday weekend. This will be my first one without those damned fireworks blasting for four days and all night long, with the fear that a bottle rocket is going to land on my roof. Things tend to burn up here. In fact, there's a fire somewhere around here right now.

And no, it's not me getting pissed off and yelling at someone.

Yarny Goodness is OPEN!

It's about damned time. I've opened Yarny Goodness for business again!

The vast majority of changes are internal; however, there will be three new fields added at the bottom of the home page: Coming Soon, New Artists/Merchandise, and Updates (for new work added to existing vendors). I'm also having a 15% off sale running through July 1st. Oh... those new fields will appear as I add new artists, which I'll be doing ever day or two and over this weekend.

I'll write a decent post tomorrow, but I just wanted to let you all know that you may now spend all your money with me. (snort)

Welcome back!

It Looks Like I May Survive Another One (and general musings)

Yes, it's that day again. Today, June 23th, is my 51st birthday. (And Happy Bday to you too, Bezzie.) :)

There was a time when 30 seemed old. Then 40. Then 60. Now, 52 seems like a really wonderful age to attain. This birthday is meaningful for many reasons, not the least of which is that I'm still here. Things are on a downhill slide right now, but I'm here. So what's going on?

Well, I lost 15 pounds last week, I spend all night barfing (and not words on the screen), and I'm losing my appetite.

Don't get me wrong - I'd love to lose weight. Just not this way. But this is the way that it's happening, and I can only hope this is a phase I'm going through, not the next step of the disease. Hubster is terribly worried, but he tries not to show it. The same with my mother and grandmother. I see my doctor next week, so I'll talk to him about it then.

Emma has become my personal protector. I can't even fart without her barking, running right to my side, and gluing herself to my leg. If I sit on the couch, she either sits on the couch next to me or on the floor against my leg. It really doesn't matter as long as some part of her is touching me. When I fall and cry, she abandons whatever she's doing and runs to me, checking me out as if I were a puppy. And the ultimate sacrifice for a bulldog?

Hubster took her out to do her business while I was sitting in my chair eating a piece of cake covered with powdered sugar. All of a sudden, a moth the size of a B-52 began attacking my face and head. Logic and reason tells me that the moth was there because of the insanely bright light which shines down on my work. Hysteria and fear tells me that the moth was there to torture me with it's wings and nibble me to death. So I did what any sane woman would do.

I screamed. At the top of my lungs.

As soon as I began to scream, Emma, who was about to take a dump, stopped herself up like a cork, began barking as if an intruder (the human variety) was breaking in the house, and dragged Hubster inside (we have to take her outside at night on a leash because of the coyotes). She literally dragged him up the stairs of the deck and into the house, where she immediately stationed herself next to me. I was still screaming and waving my hands around wildly. Never mind the piece of cake which had fallen over, spilling powdered sugar all over the chair, floor, knitting, etc. Never mind that all the doors and windows were open. Never mind that it sounded like I was being beaten or murdered all the way to Palm Springs. I was terrified, and Emma saw it as her duty to save me. Hubster was NOT amused and began to yell, whereupon I began to cry. It was not a pleasant scene.

The upshot? The fucking moth disappeared and Emma is now constipated. Great.

I can't quite believe that I'm over a half-century in age. It seems like yesterday that there were gas lines, Levi's were $27, an 8-track was the epitome in car stereos, Senior Cut Day to Santa Cruz had just passed, and I graduated from high school. Then came college and work, and my daughter. Then I got married. Six years later, I got divorced and spent a year alone in my house because you couldn't give away a house anywhere in California. Relationships. Fights with the family. Illness and deaths. So many things, so many events, so many memories. And now I'm sitting here at 4:45 a.m. in a big cabin in the mountains of Southern California wondering how in the hell I got here. Life is funny.

I saw a picture of San Francisco yesterday. It was shrouded in fog and made me intensely homesick. I love it here and will die here (and now, that's not just me saying it). But it's been six months since I've been home, and I really miss it - and my family. I know my mother will call later today, and my daughter will probably call, too. But it's not the same. I crave the birthdays of my youth, when everybody fawned all over you, you got lots of presents, and the entire day was magical. Now, it's a day like any other day. I don't get presents from Hubster; we've never exchanged birthday gifts because I buy whatever I want. It's not a special day anymore. And yet... some part of me longs for it to be. Every year, I'm disappointed and wait until the following year to see if it will be different. And every year, it sucks worse than the one before.

Last year at this time, I was heading up to Folsom Prison for my visit. My boys bestowed gifts on me, and we had as much of a party as they could manage. Hubster picked me up, gave me a card with a baby English Bulldog on it, and had written inside that that was part of my gift. Then we headed to Reno and stayed in a tiny closet of a room. He gave me $25 and told me that we were broke, but that he had managed to scrape that amount of money up so I could gamble a little. At the time, I was a beast - depressed, angry, demanding to know why we drove to Reno with that tiny amount of money. I've been known to bet a helluva lot more than that on one hand of blackjack. But I soon calmed down and realized what a huge sacrifice he had made. Sometimes, I'm an ass, and I certainly was that day. As it turned out, I was able to gamble for hours on that money - I just didn't play my usual high-limit slots. And we had a wonderful time. I selected Emma the next day, and the rest is history. What I wouldn't give now to have a trip to Reno again.

And yet, not all is lost. I guess next weekend, I'll be whisked away to one of the local Indian casinos for a spa day. I think there's an overnight trip involved, too, where I'll be alone. That's fine by me - I can sit, knit, watch TV, and sprawl in a bed. A bed. Luxury. I'm so tired of sleeping in the chair, but yet, that happens every night. So far, I've not had to run upstairs to hit the bathroom, so I might have a decent night. We'll see. Anyway, I'm looking forward to next weekend, and we'll see what today brings.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I've been reflecting on my life, and it's been a damned good one. Sure, I've had terrible times - we all do. But I wouldn't trade any of it for anything. I've met fascinating people, traveled, eaten well, loved hard, had my dream car, my dream house, and always come out of adversity smelling like a rose. I've been with Hubster for 20 years. I have a snoring bulldog laying next to me, making sure that her Mommy is doing okay. And should I not make it to my next birthday, it's okay. I'd rather stay here with Hubster and my family, of course, but should that not be in the cards, I still wouldn't change a thing.

Well... I would like to finish this damn pair of socks first.

Secret Pal 14 Signups to Close Monday, June 22nd

Yes, I'm finally up and alive. I'll post later tonight or this weekend; I have a lot of people to thank and a lot of things to get done, but for the time being (today), I'm still under rest orders. My back is killing me; it seems that the shots aren't doing anything other than being a pain right above my ass.

This post is really meant for one thing: I have to let everyone know that if they want to join Secret Pal 14, they have just a couple more days to do so. Signups are closing this Monday, June 22nd. We've extended the signup time to see if we could get more participants, but we can't extend it any longer. So please... if you want to join what I truly think is the best swap going, sign up before we shut down and can't accept your application. We have to divide everybody up into groups, get a hostess assigned to them, and open the swap on July 1st.

Thank you, everyone, and I'll blab a lot more in the next day or two. Have a terrific weekend!

Letting her rest...

Howdy all -

Mark here again...

Pam is definitely trying to over-do again because she wants to do well by all of you... her artists and her customers. However, I've put my foot down again (and it is a very big foot), and I am having her rest. The shop will be up in the next few days -- in a week no one will even remember if it opened on a Thursday or a Saturday.

Thank you all for all of your kind letters, they've really made her feel better.

Take care, everyone.

The Sick Bitch is Home

I'm finally back home and safely ensconced in my chair with my knitting in hand (I'm working on a very special pair of socks for a very special friend). Well, that's not entirely true - I moved to the couch so I could write this post. First of all, thank you to everyone who sent me letters with such lovely sentiments. I was truly blown away, and my spirits were lifted high. You're all such wonderful friends; I wish I could meet all of you in person, but it really doesn't matter. I carry you all with me in my heart.

Things have gotten a little worse. Even though the discs are leaking, they're also swollen so badly that the doctor could barely fit the needle in. This time, I felt it slide along the vertebrae and heard the pop and crunch as it finally went in - four times. Sigh. At least he didn't do my knee again. I have to repeat this again in two weeks. Happy happy joy joy. Right now, I'm exhausted and in a considerable amount of pain. Emma is curled around my hips as I'm sitting here typing; she's trying her best to make me feel better. I was in bed sleeping, and she curled up against my back (right above the injection site). How in the hell she knows where I hurt the worst is beyond me.

I'll be working on the shop later tonight - I just don't have the energy right now - so we can reopen tomorrow (Thursday). I've probably already told you, but I'm having a 15% off sale. We have a lot of new artists and merchandise, so come and check it out! I even have that most coveted of yarns - Woolly Boully. There isn't much - only about four or six skeins - but if you're a fan, grab it while you can. Jenny dyed it just for me, so of course I had to snatch a skein for myself. :)

Signups are still open for SP14, so if you're at all interested, please go to the blog and sign up! Of all the swaps I've been in, this is my favorite. It's a lot of fun, and you make really good friends through it. A lot of people who signed up for the last round haven't signed up this time around, so I hope you come back and join in the fun. There are only a couple of returning hostesses - the rest of us are new - so look for lots of contests, games, and other fun things with great prizes to win!

My birthday is next Tuesday (June 23rd), so I'm already telling Hubster what day it is just in case he forgot. I love birthdays, and this will be my first one away from my family. He hasn't given me any clues as to what we're doing, but whatever it is, I'm sure it will be lovely.

My back is killing me, so I'm off to knit for a while before I work on the shop. It's good to be home, and I'll get a letter off to everybody who wrote in the next few days. Again, thank you - what a homecoming!

Hm... maybe I'll dose up on Dilaudid before I begin to knit. Then I can see how many stitches I can drop when I nod off and drop my sock on the floor.

Simple things amuse me.

Pam in Hospital

Hi, this is Mark (Hubster). I sent out an iContact newsletter, but then I realized that not all of you get the shop newsletter.

Pam had to go to the doctor's today for what she thought was just pain management. He gave her four shots in her spine again. She's in the hospital resting and will be home tomorrow, so we've had to postpone the opening of the shop since she's the one who does all the actual listing. It will open Thursday instead of Wednesday.

I'm sorry for the delay, but her health is my primary concern. I want to thank everybody for all the letters she's received. They have really lifted her spirits to know she has so many people who love her.

Mark (Hubster)

Time to Post!

I've really got to get my shit together.

Days pass and nothing gets done. No posts, no knitting progress, nothing. I've decided that I'm tired of being in a funk and have kicked myself in the ass. I don't know how much good it will do, but at least I'm giving it the old college try.

Oh wait... all I did in college was get knocked up. Scratch that.

I'm giving it the old uh... uh... hm. I'm trying.

I've got a bit of news for you all. The shop is finally opening! Come this Wednesday, June 17th, we'll be back in operation. It's been a long time, I know, but what with everything going on, it's been very difficult to get any work done on it. However, I'm going to be putting the finishing touches on it Tuesday, so look for it to be open Wednesday afternoon (in case I don't get all the little things done on Tuesday night). I'm having a 15% off sale on everything through Sunday, so come and see the new artists, the new merchandise, and go shopping! Please... I need the money. :)

I want to thank everyone for the comments they left about my condition. You don't know what those meant to me. I'm always amazed at the number of people who read this blog, and even more amazed at the number of friends I have and all the people who care. That's why I continue to barf out my life here - I'm talking to my friends. I see the doc tomorrow, but it's for pain management. At this stage of the game, there's nothing that can be done other than to manage the pain. I don't know if he'll put me on anything different, up my current meds, or what. As long as he doesn't stick that fucking needle in my back again, we're square. (shudder)

On a more humorous note, it's happened again.

RIINNNGGGGG RIINNNGGGG RIINNNGGGG

"Hello?"

"Hi! This is Adele! How do I pick up a stitch that I dropped six rows down? You know, it's the pattern with all the YO's and K2tog's and SSK's. I think it's on the section where the pattern begins to change and you start doing a lot of increases and decreases and picking up stitches and it looks like basketweave and..."

"Uh... I'm sorry, but this is WHO?"

"Adele! I'm the one with the long blond hair, kind of pudgy, I drive an SUV..."

"Uh... OK... uh... I'm sorry, but I really don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh, I'm sure you teach a lot of classes, so maybe you don't remember where I was on that particular project. I'm on Row 37 and ready to change to color 10."

"What class did you say this was?"

"Lace entrelac. So I tried pulling the needle out, and a bunch of the little basketweave parts fell out and the lace unraveled and I can't get them back on the needle and I cut all the yarn on each piece so I only have little pieces of yarn to work with and should I use a smaller needle?"

(my head is spinning and my eyes are beginning to blink rapidly)

"Uh.... how did you get my phone number? It's unlisted."

"Oh, I got it from another lady in the class, you know, the fat one with black hair. She's a lot farther along than me. So when I ..."

"I don't mean to cut you off, but I haven't taught that class for two years, I don't know who you are, I have no idea what pattern I taught, and I'm afraid I can't help you."

"What sort of lousy teacher are you? I paid a lot of money for that class and you said I could call you at any time and you'd help me and I need help and you have to help me because you said you would. So like I said, I think I'm on Row 37... no, maybe it's Row 47..."

"I'm sorry, but I have another call coming in. I can't help you. My advice is to throw it away, start it over, and pay attention to what you're doing."

"You're a rude bitch and I'm never taking another class from you again." CLICK.

Geez. Anybody who can't count shouldn't undertake a project like that. Whatever it was.

Then another call did come in.

RIINNNGGGG RIINNNGGGG RIINNNGGGG

"Hello?"

"Hey pretty lady, this is Fantastic Frank. How you been, doll face?"

"Uh... who are you trying to reach?"

"The Java Lounge! You're just playing games with old Frank again. Hey, I need to reserve five tables for tonight. We're in a bowling tournament down in Hemet, and we want to come for coffee and fattening shit afterwards. Can you fix me up, hot stuff?"

(we have the number that used to belong to Java Lounge, a coffee place here in town which closed right before we moved here)

"Ohhhhh... Frank! I'm sorry I didn't recognize you. I'm busy with customers right now, but sure! I'd be happy to reserve five tables for you. What time?"

"How about 8:00 p.m.? We finish up at about 6:30, but you know it takes time to get out of the bowling alley and drive up the hill."

"Not a problem, Frank. We'll see you then!"

"Fantastic, honey pie! See you later!" CLICK

Heh. I'm going to hell for sure.

Then I decided to try out one of the knitting applications I bought for my iPhone. I think this one is called "Knitting Buddy". You can keep track of yarn, needles, projects, etc., on it. So I figured I'd put in one of the sock patterns I'm working on for a friend. I touched the screen under "Needles" and was presented with every size needle ever made. After figuring out how to use it, I got the needle size put in. Then it asked me for the type and length. OK... no problem. Yarn? Got it. Color? Uh... this is an indie multi (as are all my yarns). So I selected the most prevalent color (they give you a list). Picture - download or take one? Uh... well.... I do have a camera on the phone, so I touched "Take One" and the camera came on. I put the ball of yarn on my leg, centered it in the screen, held my breath, and touched the button. FLASH! Picture taken. Then I saw it.

A perfectly centered picture of my foot.

I took another one. This one came out better. Then it gave me a "Notes" section, into which I put the fact that the yarn is a multi and listed all the colors. There. One project down, four more to enter. At least I'm not inventorying my stash. That would take the new 32g iPhone with a memory card added. I've decided to keep track of my projects in this thing and take pictures of the finished items.

IF I finish any items.

I think I have about eight knitting applications for the iPhone, only one of which I've used. There's even a row counter, a gauge counter, a shopping list thing, blah blah blah. If it's a knitting gadget, I buy it.

I don't remember if I told you, but my Emma has been sick. She came in the house a week or so ago after going outside to go potty with poop and blood all over her butt. Since she's shaped like a solid fireplug, she can't turn around to clean herself. She stood there with sad eyes looking at Daddy (she knows that Mommy can't deal with doggie doo). Hubster cleaned her up and then took her upstairs to feed her dinner. Right after dinner, she had to go out again. Same thing. Fifteen minutes later, she had to go again. And so it went for two days until we could get in to see the vet whom our groomer recommended.

We finally found the vet's office in the middle of a grapefruit orchard (it smelled really good). He took all her vitals, examined her, looked at the poop sample we brought in, and told us that she either had a viral infection or an allergy to something. In any event, he prescribed sulfa drugs and told us to put her on a rice and cottage cheese diet until her poops were firm again. He also gave us a cream which Hubster had to rub under her tail a couple times a day for about a week (she had a skin infection under her tail that we didn't know about). Sure enough, she cleared up almost immediately. This guy is good - every bit as good as our vet in Livermore. He reminds me of the old-fashioned country vets you see on TV. We're keeping him.

And on another Emma note, she presented us with a totally mauled dead animal this evening. We think it was a squirrel, but we're not sure. Hubster took it away from her and threw it over the fence. Gack. That dog is more like a cat than a dog, from bringing things home to us to how she holds things in her paws to how she stalks potential prey (like the cardboard tubes inside toilet paper rolls).

Figures I'd get an identity-confused animal. There's nothing normal in this house.

Except me, of course.

(cough)

PLEASE Sign Up for SP14!

This is a plea, pure and simple. I hope you consider it.

Secret Pal 14 is nearing the end of it's signups, and we're way down in numbers this round. We're also low on United States participants. Please... consider signing up for it. There are three tiers of signup amounts: $30, $60 and $90. It's a three-month swap, so you have plenty of time to get to know your pal. Of all the swaps I've been in, this is by far the best. The hostesses are exceptional (we have a lot of new hostesses this year), there are contests, and it's just a whole lot of fun. I've made some incredible friends in the rounds I've participated in.

There's also a Ravelry group which is dedicated to discussion, and a blog for general and specific information. It's well-organized, and I think you would have a ball participating.

If you would like to sign up, the blog is at:

http://secretpalxiv.blogspot.com/

All the information for joining (as well as the swap rules) are there.

I'll be writing a regular post in the next day or so. I've just been too busy and tired to sit down and write something which you would enjoy reading, but I'll correct that. Until then...

SIGN UP!!!!