RIP, my Sweet Tillie

Yes, you read that right.  Tuesday, at approximately 5:15p, my dear, sweet Tillie collapsed and died in my arms.  She wasn’t even two years old.  To say that I’m shattered is an understatement.  I took her to the vet, but they were unable to resuscitate her.  She’s being cremated and brought home to rest next to my Emma.

They say there’s light at the end of every tunnel, and in this case, it’s true.  That same Tuesday, I got notification that a bulldog needed a home.  I sent in an application, saw her yesterday, and she was delivered with all her things last evening.  Her name is Roxy, and I believe both my Emma and Tillie dwell within her.  She’s an America Bulldog instead of an English and, while I miss those stumpy, snorting, wrinkly little creatures lumbering around the house, she’s absolutely adorable.  She also falls down when I yell bang, knows all her commands, and is perfect in every way.  We’ve already bonded in such a short time, and I know my babies sent her to me because they can’t bear to see me hurting so badly.  She also licks away my tears when I cry for my Tillie.  She’ll help me with my grief; I’ll give her a new, happy, loving life.  It’s a win-win for both of us.

On other fronts, there isn’t much at all going on.  I’m spinning, knitting (although the past few days, I’ve barely managed to get out of bed), and generally farting around.  I’m also smoking like a chimney, but now that I have Roxy, I’ll stop again.  My life is so boring, it’s a wonder I don’t fall down in a dead faint when I get to go to the grocery store from the sheer excitement of actually getting in the car.

Yesterday was also a banner day for gifts.  Fiber, spindles, lots of other doodads from dear friends - it brought light into my life and made me realize that I have friends who care deeply about me.  Sometimes, when all you see is black, the obvious goes unnoticed.  That was the case until I got everything - including Roxy - as well as many concerned messages.  I’m indeed fortunate, boring life or not.  Maybe today I’ll actually work on my shit again, and I’ll definitely play fetch with Roxy and shoot her a few times just to watch her fall over.  It’s hilarious, but a good tummy rub is expected after performing that feat.

I’m sorry to be so boring today, but after Tillie’s loss, it knocked all the wind out of me.  I’m grateful I still have people reading this, and I’m also grateful for good friends, Roxy, my family, and coffee...